I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize