So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
