Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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