you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
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She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
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So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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