Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
