love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
you inspire me to be a worse person
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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