So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
