There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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