So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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