He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
