you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
