Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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