Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
