Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
she peed on how many people?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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