I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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