I wannas sexs uuuuu
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
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