Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Randomize
