piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Terrible idea I love it
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
