It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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