we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
