You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
i black out too much to be "responsible"
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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