So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
