So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize