you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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