I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
