He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
