it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Can't talk, ducks in the car
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
