Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize