Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
