I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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