Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
