Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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