look no pants
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize