I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
