New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
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