Pants 0. Shit 1.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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