Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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