I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
