If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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