The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
