HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.