i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Your mouth is God's brothel.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
