It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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