It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
