i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
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he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
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You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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