She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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