We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize