well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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