Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Randomize
