awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i wish my penis had a tongue
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
