Do you still have your period?
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
